Inflexible

Let me just say this right from the start: if you have one of those flexi-lead, extend-a-leash – whatever – type dog leashes (the ones with the plastic handle containing a twenty foot spool of nylon string): get rid of it. There’s almost no point to having a leash at all if you’re using one; in fact, it would be easier on the rest of us if you didn’t. My friend Nick (credit where credit’s due, though I’d really like to own this one) describes a dog on a flexi-lead as akin to “an ICBM* tied to a kite string.” Yep, that just about covers it.


The law in NYC and most other large cities says that a dog leash must be no more than six feet long. In my extensive experience, that’s just about perfect. A good sturdy leash of six feet is plenty to give you control and your dog a little leeway (although he really should be heeling, not wandering, the majority of the time). Flexi-leads provide absolutely zero control. The thin nylon line is completely inadequate for managing your dog in any type of situation. Furthermore, users of these contraptions tend to let their dogs wander in front of, or around, anyplace they please. They end up tripping and angering passersby, or getting tangled around the necks or legs of other dogs. In a panicky situation (which, as we all know, frequently occurs with excited dogs on flexi-leads), a dog or a small child caught up by the thin rope could be seriously wounded or garroted. These devices are impractical nuisances. Don’t use them. And if you must, then just don't do it anywhere near another living creature.


* In case you’re not a Cold War Kid, ICBM = Inter-Continental Ballistic Missile. You know, like the ones we have pointed at Russia.